Give as you have received

From the very beginning, the Bible speaks of being blessed by God and blessing others.

Gen 1:22 Then God blessed them (animals) and said, “Be fruitful and multiply and fill the waters of the seas, and let birds multiply on the earth.”

28 And God blessed them (Adam and Eve). And God said to them, “Be fruitful and multiply and fill the earth and subdue it, and have dominion over the fish of the sea and over the birds of the heavens and over every living thing that moves on the earth.” 

And God said, “Behold, I have given (a gift, a blessing) you every plant yielding seed that is on the face of all the earth, and every tree with seed in its fruit. You shall have them for food to every beast of the earth and to every bird of the heavens and to everything that creeps on the earth, everything that has the breath of life, I have given every green plant for food (i.e. as nourishment so you can be more fruitful and also for your pleasure as a reminder of God's love and care).” And it was so. - Gen 1:28‭-‬30 

These instructions to be fruitful and multiply at the very outset tell us God wants life to expand and flourish - especially for us, the bearers of His image. He wants to expand (multiply) the blessings He gives. Hinted at in these blessings is our blessing others. This becomes even clearer as we continue further.

Each new day of creation was a new blessing from God being increasingly expanded. After each day, God pronounced all He did and made was good, i.e. a blessing.

Even after He cleansed the earth of rebellious humanity through the flood, God again pronounces His desire to bless us.

And God blessed Noah and his sons and said to them, “Be fruitful and multiply and fill the earth. - Gen 9:1 ESV

He wanted to be sure that after this worldwide "house" cleaning, there was no confusion that his primary desire had not changed and it was still to bless us, not destroy us - even in our state of rebellion. 

God also confirmed and illustrated His desire to bless us when He called Abram and promised to bless him.

1 Then the LORD said to Abram, ²“Leave your country, your kindred, and your father’s household, and go to the land ³I will show you.

2 ³I will make you into a great nation, and ³I will bless you;

³I will make your name great so that you will be a blessing.

3 ³I will bless those who bless you and curse those who curse you;

and all the families of the earth will be blessed through you.”

God's ultimate goal with Abram from the beginning of his call was to bless all nations through ¹him; not simply to bless Abram (or only His immediate progeny) so that only he or they could bask in the blessings and forget about everyone else.

The more we dig into scripture, the more we see that whenever God gives us anything - any blessing, i.e. ¹resource, etc - he always asks us to turn around and use it to bless others.

Why?

Because we are in His image - designed and called to be like God. 

Who is God? What is He like? 

God is an ⁴endless and perpetual overflowing fountain of love who calls us to be like Him, to be His children...a "chip off the old block," if you will. 

We are called to love as He loves us - and to give as we have received from Him. This, in large part, is what it means to be in his image.

This is also the very essence of the 1st and 2nd commandments on which all other commands are based.

This commandment involves us receiving from God life, love, and all things, and then sharing with our neighbor (others) what we receive.

How? It is only through our connection with God, being loved by Him (and recognizing how much he loves us in and through Christ but also through the many blessings of creation he has given us), and responding to His love by loving Him with all that we are and have, so that we can love our neighbors in the same way we desire to be loved (and are being loved through all the beauty and abundance given to us now in and through creation).

Contrary to the common approach to living, life isn't about getting to keep and only indulging ourselves in the blessings of life, but about getting to give. It isn't getting all you can and then sitting on and protecting our individual "can" but "getting" (receiving) all we can so we might give all we can. This is who God is and who He's designed and called us to be as bearers of His image. The more we receive, the more we are to give. To use Christ's words, "to whom much is given, much is required." And the servant who is faithful in little, will be given more.

In short, life is about being like God; living as He does, is, and designed us to be - to receive and give love as the Father and Son do between each other from all eternity past (Jn 17:25b). All this happens in, by, and through the Spirit - the Spirit of infinite and passionate love for another - God first and others that bear His image.

What is the nature and greatness of God's giving, and how did he demonstrate it? He gave until it hurt i.e. Sacrificially. He gave the very Son of His infinite and eternal affection so we might enter into that very same community of affection between the Father and Son and partake of God, who is love and life Himself (Jn 17:3); the Creator and giver of all we have and are. 

We are to be holy for He is holy i.e., like God. Holiness isn't about being perfect in conduct, but perfect in our focus and passion for God, in the same way He is for Himself. 

He is most worthy of all our affections, worship, honor, and glory. God ²is glorious and designed and calls us to partake in His glory and be glorious like Him. In so doing we bring Him the greatest honor and experience our greatest joy.

We will never experience true life as God intends until we live as he lives i.e., by receiving His overflowing blessings and sharing them with others.

And we will never be able to live this way until we partake of His life as He experiences it in the giving and receiving of glory between the Father and Son in, by, and through the Spirit.

For a discussion on sowing and reaping click here. 

For a discussion on legitimate vs illegitimate business click here 

For a discussion on giving what you have click here.

Use it or lose it, click here. 

Is making a lot of money ever legit, click here. 

For a discussion on excellence, click here. 

For a discussion on being diligent, click here

For a discussion on diligence vs being undisciplined click here

For a discussion on the fallacy of the health and wealth gospel, click here.

For a discussion on how faith is hard work, click here.

For a discussion on socialism versus capitalism, click here 

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Footnotes:

¹What comprises our resources? Any and all blessings we receive or possess, be it time, good health, money, things, talents, abilities, skills, experiences unique to us, etc.

²“Leave your country, your kindred, and your father’s household, and go to the land I will show you..."

All the things we normally look to and depend on for our sense of identity and meaning - e.g. our national origin and heritage, wealth (our own land) our extended family (kindred), and even our immediate family, Abraham was called upon by God to walk *away from and look to Him alone as the source of all he is and has...i.e. go to the land I will show you..."

*He also called him to walk towards all he previously sought and had by promising to make him a great family and nation of his own... again, so he might know that God alone is the source of all blessings and in turn us them to bless others.

GOD was calling Abraham to shift his dependence away from those things that we all naturally seek and instead place his dependence solely on God for those things.  This tells us that these things are good and right to desire 

This tells us that these things are good and right to desire but not outside of God but in and through him. God is not opposed to us having these things but He's opposed to our trying to obtain them on our own without looking to and acknowledging Him as the Giver.

³Which also involves recognizing everything we are and already have comes from him.

⁴God was rebuilding Abrams ⁶identity from the ground up. He was telling him every good thing you desire - your own land, your very own nation through your children, a great reputation - I will provide for you and that so you might honor me by being a blessing to others.

Our receiving what we need and value most is not by pursuing these directly but by being like God and blessing others, i.e. seeking first the kingdom of God. God loves to give us all these things (Rom 8:31-32; Matt 7:9-11) as long as we don't forget it is He who gives them. And He does so that we might bless others, becoming the means by which others find, see, and experience God through us.

⁵A God of overflowing abundance, beauty, love, majesty, glory, blessing, and joy.

⁶Abram eventually became Abraham (Gen 17:5). He went from being not just a father of Issac (and ultimately Israel) - as Abram - but a father of many nations - as Abraham.  

God is a God of overflowing abundance and desires we partake of that abundance and in turn, share it with others. This is a primary part of what it means to be like God - in His image.

What is the narrow way

Is the following an accurate picture of what Christ was saying about the broad and narrow way?

With all scriptural passages, we must read them considering what goes on before and after any given verse - i.e. read it in the context - in order to get an understanding of the true meaning of that verse. And not only the immediate context but the context of the entire book or letter as well as the Bible as a whole. 

All scripture is in agreement; there are no contradictions. Though the Bible has many human contributors, it has one ultimate author - God himself - with a unified message. Many things may appear at odds within the Bible but when you dig deep you find they are pointing to the same God "...with whom there is no variation or shadow due to change." Jas 1:17 ESV

Before taking a course in hermeneutics (principles of biblical interpretation) many passages in scripture were unclear and confusing to me. For example, the broad and narrow gate (door) passage coming right after the "golden rule" always puzzled me. The broad and narrow gate teaching seemed to be a random one inserted into the larger passage with no connection to the surrounding verses. This is how it's usually treated.

But how does it fit in with the rest of this passage or the sermon as a whole?

Is there a common thread that runs through this chapter  (or the entire sermon in chapters 5-7 - or all of scripture, for that matter)?  If so, what is it?

On close examination we see a primary thread through this sermon is how to relate to and treat others - whether the "other" is God himself, our neighbors, or anyone (including those who see us as enemies). The entire sermon has to do with loving God and others, i.e. applying the greatest commandment and the 2nd which is like it "...which is a summary of the Law and the Prophets" i.e. the main overall teaching of the OT as well as the NT.

Is the "golden rule" mentioned in verse 12 and the broad and narrow way right after it randomly sandwiched between other teachings of Christ with no apparent relationship to the surrounding verses i.e. completely out of place and standing on its own? The "golden rule" is actually the unifying thread throughout the whole sermon on the mount. We could argue it is the unifying message of the bible itself.

We may have heard the narrow and broad gate is about our eternal destination, who and how many go where eternally - as pictured at the beginning above. But the context is not directly about our eternal destination.

“So whatever you wish that others would do to you, do also to them, for this is the Law and the Prophets. “Enter by the narrow gate. For the gate is wide and the way is easy that leads to destruction, and those who enter by it are many. For the gate is narrow and the way is hard that leads to life, and those who find it are few." - Matthew 7:12‭-‬14 ESV

In light of this context, how should we interpret the broad and narrow gate (way) passage? I offer the following interpretation for consideration.

“So whatever you wish that others would do to you, do also to them, for this (my command to love your neighbor as you love yourself) is the Law and the Prophets. “Enter by the narrow gate (of treating others as you want them to treat you). For the gate - of loving yourself more than others - is wide (most go through it) and the way - of loving yourself more than others - is easy (it's much easier to be selfish than selfless. But selfishness...) that leads to destruction, and those who enter by it are many. For the gate is narrow and the way (of sacrificial love) is hard that leads to life (i.e. life and flourishing now, not necessarily later during our eternal life) and those who find it are few (i.e. very few people connect with God and His infinite love well enough that they are empowered to live and love sacrificially i.e. few live for God and others first instead of just for themselves). Sacrificial living is hard - "faith is hard work." Very few live this way. Matthew 7:12‭-‬14 ESV

The context calls for us to understand the narrow way of living is by the golden rule. The reason the other gate is broad is that most don't live sacrificially. In fact, very few consistently do. Those who live this way are few. It is truly a narrow gate to go through.

To not live according to the golden rule does in fact lead to great harm and destruction here on earth… our own as well as that of others. We see it daily all around us. It is, in fact, the reason for all ¹human conflict on this planet right now. 

This ultimately leads to our eternal destruction but in this context, living by the golden rule is primarily about the here and now, not eternity, i.e. how we treat others today.

The sermon on the mount deals with the direction of our hearts. Christ knows - and assumes - we cannot live by this sermon without being empowered by God and his love. We can't and won't love God with our heart, soul, mind, and strength unless we know we are loved by God in this way 1st.

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Footnotes:

¹If you look at why some countries do far better morally, socially, or economically, it always points back to whether the values of that country are based on honoring God and others or using - exploiting them.

For a discussion on how we try to exploit God click here.

For a further discussion on culture and values, click here.

For a discussion on the basis of morality, click here.

For a further discussion on how prayer is central to the "Sermon on the mount" click here. 

Both love and discipline essential

We bristle at discipline when there is no love.

But

We do not operate at our maximum potential when there is no discipline.

Both are essential if we are to be all God desires and designed us to be (not to mention our bringing God greatest glory and experiencing our greatest joy).

But love must come first. We were created for love. Without it we do not function as we were designed to no more than a car without gas or a sailboat without a sail, wind or water. 

Without love we do not trust...without trust we do not submit to the directions and discipline of the one who loves and seeks to direct us - mainly God but also special loved ones God has brought into our lives.

The more we realize how greatly God loves us, the easier it is to accept and embrace discipline - whether that comes in the form of obedience to a specific command from God, self denial, or enduring well any painful or hard circumstances we may encounter.

Love and discipline are two sides of the same coin of faithfully living for God's highest honor and our greatest joy.

A closer look at love.

How do we know God loves us? What proof do we have? Especially when we go though difficult times! Christ! 

God revealed his love to and for us in and through Christ by him taking on our pain so we might eventually and permanently be freed from it.

If we have no other evidence of God's love, this alone is more than sufficient. We only need to accurately and fully grasp it to appreciate the vastness of His love poured out on us in and through Christ. If we do not see who Christ is and what He did as sufficient we must ask God to help us see more fully and clearly Christ and all that He did to restore us back to the Father.

For a closer look at Christ and what He did check the following:

The incarnation - God became one of us.

Using evil for good

God binds himself to time

The humility of God

For additional posts on discipline see the following...

Diligent vs undiciplined

What is excellence?  

Eager anticipation (hope) is good

There is nothing wrong with eagerly anticipating and hoping for a successful outcome on the ¹good (Godly) things we seek and desire. 

Hope is actually a significant element of the gospel and a key part of what moves us to pray.

But we must also remember that God knows what is best. He alone sees the end from the beginning.  Whenever we pray we must always remember it is "...not my will but yours be done" that we should be seeking. We must recognize His will ultimately is always best no matter how it may appear the opposite. We may never see what that best is until we are in eternity with Christ. But we can know that conforming us to the image of Christ is always God's ultimate goal. Why? So we might experience - both now but especially in eternity - the Father's infinite love for us in the same way Christ experiences it.

He also knows how our hearts are inclined towards obtaining the blessings of life and not the Blesser. He knows whether giving us the desires of our heart will draw us away from Him or closer to Him... we don't, we only think we know. 

He knows our heart far better than we do. We must trust He is always working for both our greatest good and His highest glory in light of His infinite wisdom and a full understanding of our heart. We must always remember He is our greatest good and greatest joy, not a particular outcome of our chosing.

We get off the path when our hopes deteriorate into ²demands. God owes us nothing - though He loves to give us all things - and we can demand nothing from Him. Who has ever given to God, that God must repay them? Everything we are and have is a gift - i.e. by grace alone.

When we desire God above everything else, our desires align with His and his desires become ours. When they do, he gives us what we desire. But He alone knows when our hearts are truly and fully submitted to him. 

The bottom line? God desires we trust him even as Christ trusted Him regardless of what He does or does not give.

For a further discussion on hope click here.

For a further discussion on prayer click here.

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¹Such as a good and godly marriage or godly children; our business to be productive; to have a significant impact for God through our work, in our Christian community or other social interactions. These are all good and godly hopes but even these can get out of balance and "go south" i.e.  They can shift from being a secondary desire to our primary one.

Such as when Elijah challenged the prophets of Baal and won. God moved in a powerful way through Elijah and "showed up" the prophets of Baal. No doubt Elijah hoped this would result in Israel and it's King and Queen turning back to God (a very good hope). But they did not turn back. Because things did not go as Elijah hoped he went into hiding and a deep depression. The queen (Jezebel) had not only refused to turn to God but swore to take his life for defeating Baal her god.

²This is also where Job went off the rails. Overtime his desire for something good and valid (an explanation from God for his suffering) deteriorated into a demand. He eventually repented and recognized all he had was from God to begin with and that God owed him nothing, not even an explanation.

Brokenness...part 2

What is the nature of our brokenness?

It is the ¹absence of what (who) we were created to partake of and "run on" - so to speak. 

We could say this is more a state of spiritual bankruptcy than being broken - a condition that results in us being unable to love as we were designed to. This in turn results in our hurting (damaging) people and things around us.

You could compare us to a highly efficient and powerful car without gas that doesn't run, when others look to it for a ride or an exquisitely decorated Christmas tree to help others enjoy and celebrate the birth of Christ, but it's in a dark room unplugged. 

Without a connection to the Source of all we are and have, we simply do not function at the level we are created to.

But the effect of His ¹absence is far more than just practical or functional (though it is clearly that). It is spiritual (heart), intellectual (mind), emotional (soul), physical (strength), and every other possible way. Without God, we simply are not operating anywhere near our maximum capacity on all levels.

And because we are like God - the greatest, wisest, most powerful, yet humblest, kindest, most giving, and loving being in the universe - and meant to be in union with Him, His ¹absence impacts us far beyond anything we can comprehend. God's absence and the consequences are so significant it keeps us from even seeing His greatest, much less experiencing it. 

And not just us individually, but collectively as well. As God's image bearers, we are all designed to be loved by God 1st and love Him in return. This, in turn, results in our loving our neighbor. 

But instead of being filled with love for one another, we seek to get (take) love from one another, which results in regular conflict with other empty image-bearers. As ⁴one author described it, we are all like tics looking for a dog... with one huge problem - we are all tics. The only dog (figuratively speaking) is someone other than us creatures i.e. it is the Creator. Plus, we can't even clearly see who that dog is unless He opens our eyes i.e. He reveals Himself.

It is a wonder we can function fully at any level given the ¹immenseness of our Creator and the infinite void created by His absence.

Despite our enormous loss, we are still incredible (we are still like God) and can do incredible things but only a tiny fraction of what we were designed to do... (unless we are plugged in again).

Our ability to still function at any level at all without God speaks to the significance and power of our being ²like God and the beauty and wonder of all the gifts God has given us ³inside and out.

Though we are absent His love and felt presence, we never lost the capacity to experience, partake of, and reflect Him - especially when we are plugged in again. 

But instead of letting this void from His absence drive us back to Him, we use our gifts and our capacity for God (the void left by his absence) and try to fill that absence with created things (Rom 1:21-23) - including ⁵other God like beings (us). Things that were never meant to fill us. They only give us a taste of what is missing, but never replace Him or fill the void left by His absence.

The solution? It is summed up in the greatest and second greatest commandments.

“Teacher, which is the great commandment in the Law?” And he (Jesus) said to him, “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the great and first commandment. 

And a second is like it: You shall love your neighbor as yourself. 

On these two commandments depend all the Law and the Prophets.” - Matt 22:36‭-‬40 ESV

Christ also said, “If you love me, you will keep my commandments..." - John 14:15‭-ESV

But how do we love him and others?

We love because he first loved us. - 1 John 4:19 ESV

“If you love me, you will keep my commandments. And I will ask the Father, and he will give you another Helper, to be with you forever," - John 14:‬15-16 ESV

"...you will receive power when (and not one second before) the Holy Spirit has come upon you...” - Acts 1:8a ESV

For a discussion on the Holy Spirit, who "He" is, what He does and how he does it, see the following.

The life, love and Spirit of God (a concise discussion).

The empowering of the Spirit (an extended discussion)

Power within or without?

For an additional discussion on brokenness click here.

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¹something designed to hold an infinite object (person) will experience an equally infinite void if absent that object. 

Just imagine how effective, happy and powerful (glorious) we will one day be the day we are fully united - face to face - with the Source of life, love and all things! 

²We are still like a highly efficient and powerful car or a wonderfully decorated Christmas tree without God. We simply lack having what we need to reach our maximum potential. 

And what (or who we) lack is enormous beyond our comprehension. 

We experience some of God now but will perfectly when we are fully glorified.

God give us the grace to see and trust in your greatness.

³Inside - any and all gifts, skills and talents we genetically come into the world with, be it musical, artistic, athletic, intellectual or any other innate ability.

Outside - all of creation with all its wonder and beauty...tastes, smells, sounds...the earth, air, water. Sun, moon and stars and all the resources within these.

Also the collective experience and knowledge of humanity on how to develope and utilize our innate talents or the planets resources is also an external blessing. These are all available to us as God's image bearers that we all mutually benefits from even if and when we don't acknowledge them as being gifts from God.

⁴Dr. Larry Crabb (one of my favorite authors) in his book The Marriage Builder.

⁵

Healing trauma

There is a great deal of focus by ⁷some on trauma and past wounds. They either focus on their family of origin or some past personal traumatic event, or both. As a result, many are on a never-ending quest to uncover forgotten or hidden wounds in the hope - false, I would suggest - that this will somehow unlock them from their prison of internal pain, restlessness, loneliness, and meaninglessness. 

If the sought-after relief is not found by uncovering conventional wounds, some even explore ¹generational trauma passed down through their ancestors, which they have no immediate connection to.

While these exercises may be helpful and have ⁵significant value, they miss the more fundamental and deeper issue. All such wounds are ²secondary and can only take root in our hearts because of a far more significant ³primary trauma or wound we ⁴all have. 

To work through and be freed from secondary wounds, we shouldn't focus exclusively on them but must first address the highly critical and life-altering primary wound we ⁴all have in common.

Because of this primary wound, we all are emotionally fragile at best, resulting in even the ⁵slightest offense - i.e. secondary wounds - throwing us into "trauma" and seemingly scarring us irreparably.

Instead of focusing on our secondary wounds, we should focus on the perfect healing offered to us for our primary wound.

Why?

Until we experience healing of our primary wound, we will never be truly freed from any secondary wounds. 

As our primary wound heals - via an increasing grasp of the good news (the gospel) - the more we are freed to fully acknowledge our secondary wounds and be released from them. And the more resilient and impervious we become to all new wounds. 

Simply stated, the more whole we become, the less these secondary wounds impact or control us.

So what exactly is this primary wound? 

It is the severing of our connection with and alienation from our Creator, the Source of love, life, and all things. 

However, this wound is different. It is due to our turning away from God in distrust (unbelief), i.e., this wound is self-inflicted, i.e., one we choose. We are not the victim of this wound but the cause - perpetrators... every one of us, no exceptions. If there is a "victim," it is God Himself (objectively speaking. God doesn't need us; we need him. Nor can He be diminished by us and our choices.)

Unlike secondary wounds that are only experienced by some - such as sexual, emotional, or physical abuse - our primary wound is experienced by each and every one of us from the outset of the human race, beginning at the rebellion of our original parents (our original ancestors if you prefer) in the garden of Eden and continued by us in refusing to trust all God has done (and does) for us, to free us of our primary wound, in and through Christ.

The significance of this trauma is far greater than most of us know, much less understand. It results in us cutting ourselves off from God, the very Source of life and love. 

How can this not be traumatic? It is so traumatic that it has plunged the entire human race and all creation itself into ⁶all the pain, suffering, and death we daily hear, see, or experience to this day. It is the underlying reason behind all pain and suffering in the world, as well as our individual secondary wounds. 

This primary wound is so significant that secondary wounds will increasingly shape and cripple us less as our primary wound begins and continues to heal.

This primary wound is ⁴common to everyone of us, unlike secondary wounds, which may be similar but also unique to each of us. 

Why does this matter, and how is it different from secondary wounds? We all are in the "same boat" regarding this primary trauma and can therefore appreciate a common healing for all who receive and experience it. 

The state of humanity in all its ⁷loneliness, pain, and destructiveness in itself is evidence enough that humanity at large is disconnected and deeply wounded and in pain i.e. traumatized. Among other things, this results in all other trauma (secondary wounds) taking root and crippling us if not properly addressed.

This does not minimize secondary wounds but helps us to better understand them and not see ourselves as victims or feel isolated from the rest of humanity, who may not have gone through the same secondary trauma we have.

What is the solution to our primary wound? Christ!  Seeing and trusting in all Christ did (all the pain he took upon Himself caused by our turning away from God) to restore us to His Father and our Creator. He did this so we might ultimately be fully healed of our primary wound and free of all pain in eternity. 

It's not just what God says but what he did.

The saying goes, "Actions speak louder than words." God says He loves us, but He did far more than just say it; he proved it in and through the actions and sacrifice of Christ to restore us. 

Because of Christ, not only is the healing of our primary internal wound offered (i.e. restoration to God from our alienation with the very Source of life and love) but we are promised God's perfect ongoing providential love and care is also ours regardless of our past or present circumstances (all otherwise potentially traumatic events), as well as the eventual and total delivery from the very presence of all pain and suffering when we are fully restored through our resurrection into complete union with the Source of life, love, and all things.

Nothing will ever separate us from God's love again once we receive the spiritual and emotional healing offered to us in Christ. This love is perfectly ours right now if we receive it, and the fundamental truth we all must internalize if we are to be freed from past wounds, both primary and secondary. The more we see, grasp, and internalize (believe) this reality, the freer we become of all secondary wounds.

For a discussion on being an offender as well as offended click here.

For a discussion on how God loves the offender and offended click here.

For a discussion on being a victim vs "playing the victim," click here.

For a discussion on why our kids rebel click here.

For a discussion on how we have God's love perfectly but not yet fully, click here. 

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Footnotes:

¹You even see this within some church circles - mostly within the more charismatic and fundamentalist circles. 

They cite Deut 5:9 as a support text. But in the context, this has more to do with the outward consequences of placing a higher value on something other than God. Our kids will mirror our values (how we live our life vs how we say it should be lived) through several generations. 

This passage isn't specifically addressing internal trauma but destructive external behavior that our kids pick up through our example (often unbeknownst to us). 

²What are the effects or results of our primary wound? There is a subtle but constant undercurrent in our lives of feeling inadequate,  insignificant, unimportant, abandoned, rejected, or the like. We believe we no longer matter to the Creator. In short, we no longer feel or believe our Creator cares and loves us, but is only angry and disappointed in us. If we were raised in a loving and stable family, this is less obvious but still exists just the same. If we are raised in a home that emphasized external conformity to certain kinds of behavior, our sense of failure and insignificance might be exaggerated.

Yet He who is the very Source and Cause of life, love, and all things, sent His Son to restore us back to Himself when we were in full-blown rebellion to Him. This clearly indicates otherwise i.e. that we are not insignificant but just the opposite. 

Our sense of abandonment is not because God abandoned us but we abandon Him. 

³What is the effects or results of our secondary wounds? Any event brought about by hurtful interaction with creation - be that at the hand of other image bearers of God or with nature (creation) in general - which causes us to feel insignificant, unimportant, abandoned, rejected… i.e. we don't matter. In short we no longer feel or believe we are loved because of actions by those secondary sources of love who wound us.

⁴Knowing this is a common problem and struggle helps keep us from having a "pity party" (at the center of a victim mindset) and developing a martyr's complex - e.g. we might say to ourselves or others, "You just don't understand! No one has experienced the pain I have..." But they have. In fact, everyone has to some degree, but most importantly, especially Christ Himself. No one has or ever suffered as a true victim as Christ did...and that for our sake.

It also helps create unity among God's children as we work together and encourage each other in addressing this common problem - as well as the solution - of alienation from God and restoration through Christ. This is in fact the primary unifying force within the church universal - which can be greater than our cultural differences if we receive it - and an essential element of the good news of God's offer of full restoration i.e. the "gospel."

⁵Slight only compared to our primary wound of separation from our Creator. A separation from the very source of life, love, and all things. Secondary wounds are very real and some are devastating but still minor in comparison to separation from God and what Christ endured for us.

 ⁶We and the rest of creation have been deeply harmed and crippled and are only a fraction of our original design. It took the eternal Son of God taking on Human form and stepping into this world of pain and suffered, which was the result of our turning away from our Creator, and letting it kill him, to free us one day.

⁷This seems more common among those who are under 45. But even those among us who experience the best circumstances and most stable upbringings experience these things. Something major is still missing - we all long for more because we were created for far more...i.e. the full acceptance, embrace, and union with the very Source of life, love and all things in our state of distrust... Only possible because of Christ's efforts on our behalf.

⁸No doubt, the fracturing of the family unit and the increase in broken homes since the early 60s has contributed to this trend.

Misplaced honor

At the heart of all poor (wrong) choices is misplaced ¹honor. We either honor (glorify - value) something more than it deserves or ¹dishonor who or what deserves it most.

Why would we do this? 

Because we do not properly see the true value of things. As a result, we either assign to something greater value than it actually has or we do not recognize how valuable something truly is.

An illustration:

A starving blind man has

two items placed before him - 

1. A warm, freshly baked loaf of bread and 

2. A cold, smooth, egg like, 5 pound piece of gold (worth over $350K at current prices).

When asked to pick one, which would he pick? He would likely pick the bread. 

Why? Though he is blind, he can still smell the breads delicious aroma and feel its soft warm texture, but can't see what either object is. The gold egg would be cold, heavy, odorless, and tasteless. 

Also, his hunger might be so great it overpowers his ability to ³reason i.e. his need for ²food will overwhelm his ability to think clearly and properly assess the possibility of the other object having greater value. When he holds the piece of gold, he'll only know it's cold, smooth and heavy but he would not be able to determine what it is...i.e. gold, lead, steel, polished marble, etc? 

Because his ability to evaluate the true value of the objects is impaired, he is limited in his ability to accurately assess that value. As a result it is very likely he will not make the wisest choice. 

If he chose the egg over the bread, it would be an act of faith (or maybe an act of stupidity, according to his blind friends). The sure thing would be the warm bread. 

But he actually made his choice based on ⁴faith – an act of trust in one thing and distrust in another - that the bread was more valuable than this tasteless, odorless 5-pound "egg," when in reality the gold was of far greater value and could gain for him all the food - and more - he needed for a long time - possibly the rest of his life if he managed things well.

Why was trust necessary in this situation? Because of the limitations of the blind man. He could not see what the two objects before him were, only feel and smell them. 

So it is with all of us. Because we are spiritually blind (and God is Spirit) and we do not possess infinite knowledge or the ability to be everywhere to observe everything in the universe there is to know, we can not assess whether God exists or what He's truly like. We have hints, but because of our appetite for immediate gratification, we ⁵opt for created things vs the Creator of those things who is far (i.e. infinitely) more valuable - if only because all things exist because of Him. Therefore, we will assess what He is like based on a very limited understanding of what we experience only with our senses.

Add to the analogy a person presenting him the two objects with perfect sight and knowledge of the true value of the objects. He tells him the egg like object is the better choice (but with no further information given). What would the blind man do? It all depends on how much he knows and trusts this person.

For us to choose the better of two options, we must see their true value (or trust the one presenting them who clearly knows their true value) or we will not give them their proper regard - honor.

Because we can not see fully, we must trust. Either choice we make requires faith...faith that our senses are sufficient to accurately assess things or faith in someone who claims to have perfect understanding, cares for us perfectly and has the complete ability (power) to deliver on what they promise-claim.

Our perception of God is skewed for many reasons, keeping us from seeing and trusting who he truly is. 

Christ said if you have seen me you have seen the Father, i.e. God. If you want to know what God is like, get to know me (Jesus)...who I am - my heart, why I stepped into this world of suffering out of the bliss of heaven, what I did to remedy the pain, suffering, blindness and brokenness in you and the world so you could permanently and ultimately be free from it one day. When we understand these, we will know God's true heart and character and honor Him accordingly.

For a further discussion on seeing clearly, click here.

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¹Wrapped up in this idea of honor (glory) is the value, significance, and worth we give or do not give something. This is also the essence - the heart - of worship. When we honor someone according to their true worth, we glorify or worship them.

²Spiritual food (food for our heart) comprises a sense of meaning, value and purpose - in a word love. We choose that which we believe will best give us love. But that choice is based on our limited understanding. To have true understanding, we must ask someone who has perfect knowledge and who perfectly loves to reveal to us what is best. Perfect love engenders trust.

³The next time you go grocery shopping, pay attention to your choices when you're hungry versus when you're not. If you have already tried this, you may notice the food you select will be different. When hungry, you may pick more foods that require no preparation so you can eat them right away vs food that is more healthy but takes time to prepare. Our hunger affects our choice. Immediate gratification vs delayed gratification may dominate unless you've learned the health benefits of preparing a balanced meal and how to discipline yourself through delayed gratification, i.e. you've learned (and believe) delayed gratification is the better choice.

⁴Faith in what? Faith that what we seek will deliver on what it appears to promise. That promise comprises something giving to us what we believe we need most. 

All choices involve faith by virtue of our limits. We are not all-knowing, all-powerful and everywhere present to confirm what we seek is what we most need or whether it will give us what it appears to promise. So we must both trust that what we trust in can deliver on what it promises. And what it can deliver is, in fact, what is best for us (not just what we think is best).

So the question we must ask ourselves is how is our approach working so far? If you feel it's working great and it is does not involve the Creator, then you will never see him as he truly is.

⁵Not totally unlike what Adam and Eve did.