Saturday, November 20, 2021

Pain - normal or common?

Because ¹pain is such a ¹constant part of our lives (from the first time we left our ²mother's womb and cried) it feels normal i.e. it has been a common part of our life from the first moment we came into this world.

On one level we have become so acclimated to pain we even buy into the notion that death is a normal part of life e.g. it's simply part of the "circle of life" as portrayed in the popular animated movie "The Lion King." Ironically this is actually a denial of death i.e. an attempt to make it less than it really is. In reality, death is a travesty we weren't originally designed for.

Suffering as well is ²not normal, it's simply common - and commonly shared. ³Everyone is in pain to various degrees, from the least privileged to the most. This is comforting in an odd way because we know we are not alone in our suffering. As the saying goes, misery loves company. But it also allows us to brush it aside as a normal part of life, when it's not. We tell ourselves to stop whining and having a pity party (or questioning struggles) because everyone goes through pain.

Even those who experience the best circumstances - and least trauma in life - are in pain at some level. The difference is some are able to arrange their world/circumstances well enough to dull the pain better than others. And those that do should be the happiest among us, but usually are not - outside those who know God and His infinite love.

The truth is those blessed enough to be sorounded with enough gifts ("toys" - creature comforts) to distract themselves from ⁴internal pain, is not that common. It is the exception, not the rule. Few of us are wealthy enough or gifted with enough natural talents to arrange our circumstances so we can completely avoid pain. Plus those that have the most creature comforts are privately still in ⁴pain. The high rate of substance abuse, other addictions and even suicide among the wealthiest are all indications. No matter how good or challenging our circumstances ⁵no one is pain free.

The good news is Christ understands pain better than any of us and embraced our pain so that we might not have to.

For a further discussion of why God allows evil to continue click here.

For a further discussion of how God uses pain for our good click here...and here.

The greater the evil the greater the opportunity for healing/grace click here.

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¹If our mom's environment or even her emotional state was sufficiently troubled before we were born we no doubt picked up and experienced some of her pain and it transfered to us.

²We were not designed for pain but for infinite love and joy because we were created like God who is infinite love and joy. To participate in who He is we must be like him. Our problem is we reject him and therefore are absent what we were created for and need most, causing us on-going pain. Those of us who accept God's offer to be restored to him will one day be completely free of pain. That offer is extended to any who will receive it.

³I'm referring primarily to emotional pain -  though we all experience various physical ailments, discomforts, disease and eventually death - the ultimate physical pain.

⁴What is the essence of this emotional pain? It is feeling worthless, unimportant, insignificant etc. We were created for glory, not insignificance.

There is much talk about trauma in modern psychology but little talk of our critically compromised spiritual condition that allows trauma to take root and effect us in the first place. 

Trauma is not just from painful events we experience but the overall state we are in e.g. we are all inclined to go about life with little to no thought about God. As a result we are not in the close relationship with Him we were created for i.e. we are alienated from Him. To be alienated from the Source of life and love - i.e. our Creator - is to be in a traumatized and vulnerable state. 

When we are connected to the Source of life - as we were meant to be - painful events (invasive violations of our being and sense of worth) do not traumatize us. To use an analogy, a pathogen cannot take hold in us when our immune system is strong. What makes up a strong spiritual immune system? When we have a strong sense of value, meaning, purpose etc. because of our union with the Infinite Source of love and value. The stronger our union, the stronger our spiritual immune system and the less trauma (pathogens) take root and effect us. 

⁵Yet we still attempt to derive comfort (reduce pain) in having it better than others.

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Grace to you
Jim Deal