Depressed Christians?

Can a mature believer experience depression?

When you recognize that depression is basically due to self-loathing and guilt over an increasingly acute sense of our extreme failure to trust God, yes depression can be and often is a part of the maturing Christians experience, possibly even in greater degrees as we mature because we become increasingly aware of how weak and untrusting of God we can be.

And that is because we are all extreme failures (Rom 3:23. For a fuller discussion click here and here) in trusting God totally.  This is in the godly sense not necessarily in the worldly sense i.e. not necessarily in the eyes of others (by world standards, we may be a great "success") but compared to God's original intended design, we are far from it. 

When we recognize we were in fact created to know God, enjoy him, and show forth his glory, reflecting his love back to him, spreading his love and greatness to other fellow image-bearers as well as all creation (i.e. stewarding the planet) and the scope and significance of this - when none of us even come close to meeting the mark - we began to see the extent of our failure. Who among the most mature of us can say we love God with all our heart, soul, mind, and strength and our neighbor as ourselves 24/7? Certainly not me. This awareness increases the more we know God and see our true condition more clearly.

Without the love of God moving us to show forth his glory we are all about ourselves; about self-promotion; being our own god. The very same disposition that Adam and Eve bought into and adopted. In short, we are totally incapable of fulfilling our design unaided... and were never intended to do so. Only by the life and love of God infused in us by His Spirit can we bring forth true, lasting life again (though we can bring temporary life to others and do daily).  

And what was God's warning? The day you seek to operate independently of me - to be your own god - you will die. Die? In what sense did we die? We rejected God, the source of life itself. We "unplugged" from the life source if you will. Our connection with the life and Spirit of God was immediately severed, eventually leading to our physical death. And from that day until now we have not sought to return to the source of life but have been desperately seeking to replace what we lost (God) by being our own god i.e. through self-effort...using creation - internally and externally - as a means. 

However, as God is diffusive (overflowing and out-flowing), we were designed to be diffusive, with one key difference. God is the source of life (Jn 17:3), we are the conduits through which his life flows. First from Him, reflected back to him from the Son, in, by, and through the Spirit, then out to others. If we cut ourselves off from the "life source" we can not and will not spread his love and glory as we were created to. We are empty of the love and life of God. It's simply no longer there to be diffused. We are takers without His love, not the givers we were originally designed to be.

So what then happens to us, as we become more and more *aware of our total spiritual bankruptcy? We feel guilty. And not just because it's some vague sense of self-imposed punishment, but because we are in fact guilty. We do not do what we were designed to do i.e. love God with all our heart, soul, mind, and strength and our neighbors as ourselves. This indeed is to greatest and most challenging order (greatest commandment) God gives us. 

 

So as maturing believers, we now battle. We battle with an increasing awareness of the depth of our brokenness hopefully, along with an increasing and matching awareness of the love of God for us as his broken but redeemed, adopted, and perfectly cherished children.  

The irony is our increasing awareness of being perfectly loved because of Christ, allows us to be increasingly honest with how unlovely we truly are. We know God does not and will not reject us due to our brokenness because Christ took our deserved rejection/ banishment and condemnation for us. And this work by him on our behalf is infinitely greater in depth and width than our brokenness (Rom 5:20). Thanks to Christ and his willingly giving himself up to restore us back to our original design.

So we struggle between growing awareness of God's perfect and infinite love and our total and complete desire to operate outside of this love i.e. our rejection of it and embracing self-love in various forms.

I propose that the awareness of our true guilt and any subsequent depression is an opportunity and possibly even a call by God to dig deeper into who Christ is, what he did, and why he did it. It is an opportunity to look hard at the extent of his work on our behalf and come to rejoice in it more and more. Our depression forces us to go back time and again and drink from an infinite, never-ending fountain of God's love and forgiveness. And thanks be to God, his is the final word; our brokenness is not.  

Who are some believers who have admitted to struggles with depression? King David, ("why are you cast down oh my soul..."),  Job, Moses, Elijah, Jeremiah, Jonah, Paul the apostle, Martin Luther. Charles Spurgeon, Henri Nouwen, John Piper to name some better-known believers. All of these great men of faith spoke of struggling with depression.

"For we do not want you to be ignorant, brothers, of the affliction we experienced in Asia. For we were so utterly burdened beyond our strength that we despaired of life itself. Indeed, we felt that we had received the sentence of death. But that was to make us rely not on ourselves but on God, who raises the dead. He delivered us from such a deadly peril, and he will deliver us. On him, we have set our hope that he will deliver us again." 2Co 1:8-10

"We are afflicted in every way, but not crushed; perplexed, but not driven to despair; persecuted, but not forsaken; struck down, but not destroyed; always carrying in the body the death of Jesus, so that the life of Jesus may also be manifested click here in our bodies. 

For we who live are always being given over to death for Jesus' sake, so that the life of Jesus also may be manifested in our mortal flesh...

...So we do not lose heart. Though our outer self is wasting away, our inner self is being renewed day by day. For this light, momentary affliction is preparing for us an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison, as we look not to the things that are seen but to the things that are unseen. For the things that are seen are transient, but the things that are unseen are eternal."  2Co 4:8-11, 16-18  

For a discussion on healing trauma click here. 

For a discussion on whether pain is normal or just common click here. 

For a discussion on the greater our sin the greater God's grace click here. 

For a discussion on how we have God fully but not all of Him yet click here. 

For a discussion on the difference between good and bad guilt click here. 

For a discussion on how we can experience more of God's love through our suffering click here. 
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*An increasing and deeper awareness of our rebellious independence from God is actually a sign of increasing maturity.