loving and valuing...the same?

In considering the definition of love, I found the word value helpful. But I also found myself wondering how ¹value is similar to love and how it's different. 

Is there a difference between loving and ¹valuing someone or something? If so, what is it? 

Something can be objectively valuable without us personally valuing it or even being aware of its value.

To say it another way, something can be infinitely valuable (objectively) without being personally (subjectively) valuable to us.

God would be a classic example of someone (or thing) infinitely valuable who is often not personally valuable - at least not to the extent of His true value. 

For something to have actual value means there is something objectively and innately valuable - important or significant - about a person or thing first regardless of whether we personally value them (it) or not. 

How is subjective value and love connected?

To personally value something is to also have affection for it i.e. to love it. Loving affection involves emotional delight in that thing or person we value. Loving affection is an indication we have personal regard ²for the value of someone or something. It is subjective, as well as objective. 

On the other hand, to value someone or thing does not necessarily make them or it valuable objectively, only subjectively. This involves personal affection toward what is considered valuable when it may not be as valuable objectively as we feel, i.e. it is not actually or objectively valuable. 

For example, we can meet someone charming that we feel could be important to us, that turns out to be nothing like they presented themselves to be. The reality of who they are doesn't match the appeal of who we thought they were or presented themselves (itself) to be.  

A classic example of a thing (vs a person) not being as valuable as we thought would be a product that doesn't equal or live up to the "sales pitch" e.g. a job, a certain level of wealth, a particular car, a bigger house, even something simple like a purse or a pair of shoes etc. As we learn more about these things, the reality doesn't match the hope.

This is actually common for all of us i.e. to place a higher value on someone or something than it's actually worth. This doesn't mean there is no value. They may give you some happiness initially, but not to the extent you thought or were told. They may be good things, but not the best thing and not to the extent we thought or hoped for.

One reason this difference is significant is we may have a greater affection or love for something beyond what it deserves. We can love something to the point of worshiping it (and often do) when in reality it will never deliver long-term what we want, need, or believe it will. 

We can also appreciate the beauty and value of something objectively without ever personally participating in its full value e.g. we can see and smell an exquisite meal -- which is participation on a limited level --  but we will not fully experience or benefit from it until we eat it. It is no less valuable because we don't eat it, it is just not that valuable to us personally. 

We can observe the beauty or strength of another, yet never personally experience these qualities through direct interaction. A fiancé can admire the physical beauty of his soon-to-be bride but not fully participate in and experience that beauty until they are married.

Value is ²foundational and a fundamental part of loving. It must exist first. But having loving affection for someone is personal in nature, whereas someone or thing having value is an objective fact. 

Valuing has more to do with our recognition of something's value from afar. Love/affection has more to do with intimacy (closeness) and personal enjoyment of that which is valuable.

Also, when we value something, it is usually more utilitarian or functional than affectionate.  

The most valuable

God is the Creator and Sustainer of all things thereby making Him the most significant and valuable being in the universe. Yet many do not recognize Him as such or have any affections toward Him i.e. God is valuable (objectively) even when He is not personally (subjectively) valued.  

Some even despise God for various reasons despite His infinite worth - usually because He didn't come through for them in the way they thought he should. For these people, even though God is objectively valuable, he is not personally (subjectively) attractive.  

The problem however isn't God but our belief that he is some kind of celestial butler catering to our every desire. But this would not be God at all. By definition God is controlled by no one but Himself. 

God values us?

God not only values us as his image bearers but enjoys our interaction with him. He is delighted when we are delighted in Him. He is happy when we are happy in Him. He finds pleasure in our experiencing pleasure in and from our relationship, fellowship, and communion with him. In short he not only values us he loves us.

God values all his image-bearers by virtue of them being like Him, but he does not have personal affection for all of them. Those he has personal affection for he seeks out and reconciles to himself. 

If this tugs at your heart, He is seeking you. If it doesn't pray He stirs your heart to seek Him. 

For a discussion on why God delights in our delight click here.

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¹by value I simply mean something of importance, e.g. When we say someone has strong values, we mean certain things are very important to them, such as family. When we say someone has strong family values, we mean they place high importance on their family over other things. 

²something cannot be truly loved or worth loving until it is first valuable (objectively) and then valued (subjectively).

³The opposite is true for the same reason. Someone who has personal regard for us also has affection for us. This, however, doesn't mean someone has to have affection for us to treat us in a loving manner. They can treat us well simply because they recognize our value, i.e. that we are worth being treated well by virtue of being in God's image - i.e. like God - and because God has called us to treat others as we wish to be treated. 

Don't be surprised by suffering

If God is good, why does He allow evil (pain and suffering)? This is the age-old question and the reason many give for why they don't trust God.

But could it be that God allows this to humble us and help us see that life doesn't truly work - as God intends - without Him? Could the reason for pain and suffering be this simple and come with such loving intentions?

What most do not consider is pain and suffering are the eventual outcome and natural consequences of ¹arrogance.

But they can also become the ²means by which God humbles us if we let it. Evil itself is bad but humility and whatever is needed to humble us and draw us closer to God is good, not bad (though often unpleasant). A seeming contradiction?

Our inability to find true and lasting life and love apart from God can direct us back to Him - but only if we turn from our arrogant and stubborn belief that we can achieve these and make life work on our own without Him. If we persist in our unbelief, the painful consequences of our rebellious distrust of God - i.e. the evil and harm it brings - are not His fault, but our choice. 

We often don't grasp the far-reaching significance or impact of our rebellious distrust of God i.e. how harmful and destructive it truly is, not just to others but ourselves as well.

The fact that we are surprised, put off, or offended by pain and suffering (evil) is proof of how little we understand the far-reaching impact and severe consequences of our distrust of God.

We should not be surprised by the suffering caused by evil. It is the natural outcome of believing we can make life work without God and trying to do so, when all the pain it causes tells us otherwise. 

Trying to make life work without God is a lie. Life only works as it was designed to i.e. when we are in perfect alignment and union with God our Creator the source of life, love, and all things, in whose image we were created.

We all have the capacity to see far more than we can now see about God, ourselves, and life (such as the pain and suffering our unbelief causes). The only thing blocking us from seeing more clearly is our lack of humility - refusing to acknowledge our need for and dependence on God for all we have and are. 

For a further discussion of how God uses evil for our good click here...and here.

The greater the evil the greater the opportunity for healing/

grace click here.

For a discussion on the key lesson from the book of Job, click here.

For a discussion on the value of paradox, click here.

For a discussion of how big is God click here

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¹Even suicide is an act of arrogance. Someone ends their life because they believe it is not worth living. Yet they don't consider the foundational reason they are in despair is the absence of God i.e. their lack of trust in God and His wisdom and love in allowing pain (the organic and rightful consequences of unbelief) to continue.

²God is so wise, powerful, and good, that he uses evil for good. Only He can. But we will never see or understand this if we do not trust Him. 

"Oh, the depth of the riches and wisdom and knowledge of God! How unsearchable are his judgments and how inscrutable his ways! 

“For who has known the mind of the Lord, or who has been his counselor?” “Or who has given a gift to him that he might be repaid?” For from him and through him and to him are all things. To him be glory forever. Amen." Rom.11.33-36

The necessity of dependence

The very acts of eating, drinking, and breathing are daily reminders that we ¹depend on things outside ourselves for life. They also remind us of how fragile life truly is when we can not access these basic essential resources.

When we stop to consider it, what is necessary for life comes to us from ²without, not within. If we do not partake of these physical resources we die. We usually don't give this much thought until the threat of not having these presents itself.

This is not only true physically but spiritually as well. Without God - and these physical resources created and sustained by Him - we cease to ³function as we were designed to.

So we are indirectly sustained by God through the things that we need for life.

No amount of rebellion or desire to be ²independent - "free" - of our physical or spiritual needs (or limits) will change our dependence. We may ignore, resist, or deny our dependence, but to do so means death - physically and spiritually. 

To continue receiving and benefiting from what we must have for life requires our acknowledgement of our ongoing dependence on them.

Even though we often despise ²dependence, in the above examples dependence is good, not bad, because it helps sustains our lives.

Every day is a gift. It is not guaranteed or a right. Without God and all He provides, only death is certain, not life. Be grateful for your life and all it offers and seek to use it to honor the Giver.

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Footnotes:

¹Even though eating, drinking, and breathing are activities of dependence, we all love a good meal when hungry, a cold refreshing drink when thirsty, and fresh air when we are couped up in a place where the air is stale or unpleasant. We grow to love and appreciate these even more when we have gone through times when they were not readily available or were gone temporarily. 

Eating, drinking, and breathing are so much a part of our lives we do not see or treat the use of them as "acts of dependence." 

But this doesn't make them any less so. It simply indicates how much we take for granted the good things we have. It is only when we do not have them that we fully appreciate their value and the reality of our absolute life-or-death dependence on them.

In fact, isn't this the value of suffering? It makes us aware of our true status of being dependent creatures, i.e. it brings our understanding of who we are more in line with reality - a reality check if you will. 

Reality is good however not bad. Living in the real world maximizes our flourishing and minimizes harm to us and others. 

It is not the gifts we despise, but our general dependence we dislike. We wish to be free of all "restraints." However, wouldn't we all be better off if we learned to embrace all the ways we are dependent in the same way we do these everyday gifts we usually take for granted, i.e. with gratitude?

It is worth noting that Christ characterized Himself as the bread and water of life. This assumes we need far more than just what this life offers. As believers these are comforting promises and we gladly embrace this truth about Christ.

²We are told in scripture that our very breath comes from God. And not only our breath but everything we are and have are gifts from our Creator, whether we acknowledge this or not and whether we use them as God intends - designs.

³When not aligned with our Creator, we not only cease to function well, but we ultimately go into eternity on this same course - i.e. without Him - but also without access to the creation we presently enjoy. For more on this click here.

Forsaken and abandoned?

When we experience pain - emotionally or physically - our biggest struggle is thinking we are forsaken and abandoned by God.

Yet God's greatest promise is nothing - especially suffering - will ever separate those who trust and love Christ, from his love.

God's greatest proof is sending His Son to suffer what should have been our pain so He could restore us to Himself. This will ultimately free us from all pain in eternity, if not now. 

Because of this, our pain is not only temporary but actually becomes the means of how we are drawn closer to God - but only if our pain is received well - i.e. by faith that God is using our pain for our good.

We may be certain that we are a child of God and believe He loves us simply because He proved it by sending Christ, even when we are constantly bombarded with experiences that seem to indicate otherwise.

If our faith - that God is good, loving, wise, and all-powerful in allowing our pain - is not strong, the difficulties and struggles of life will beat us down when in fact God is seeking to build us up by drawing us closer to Himself - i.e. to purify and strengthen our faith through these challenges.

God is not judging us nor has he abandoned us when we go through adversity. Struggles are a part of our ¹broken condition and ²the broken world we now live in (brought about by our general overall rebellion). 

Though we are perfectly loved in and by Christ, we are not yet fully in union with God (we are not face to face with Him and in the fullness of His presence and fully glorified or totally free of pain). All of creation (especially us) is presently in bondage, awaiting our complete deliverance. 

For a further discussion of how God uses evil for our good click here...and here.

The greater the evil the greater the opportunity for healing/grace click here.

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¹And what is the nature of our existence? We are finite in our understanding and ability to gain what we most need - not only because we are disconnected from God but simply because we are finite, dependent creatures. 

But we are also spiritually dead and disconnected from the Source of all things and therefore impotent in our ability to live as we were designed to. We question God's love at the drop of a hat and the slightest breeze of adversity. We are damaged goods - "traumatized" - full of doubt and distrust when life gets hard. 

As a result, we often beat ourselves up and go through life wondering how and why God would love us. Surely, he has every right to abandon us because of our weaknesses, fears, doubts, and failures. And He does have a perfect right to, yet He chooses to meet us in our weakness, on our level - in and through Christ - to restore us back to a loving relationship with him. 

This state of current pain is due to our commitment to being our own God and our disregard for Christ's work for us. Our trust in our efforts to win God's (and other's) acceptance must shift to trust in Christ's efforts (work) on our behalf. We must stop putting confidence in our deeds and put it in Christ's which are complete and completely satisfies our need and requirement for perfect righteousness i.e. to live right toward God and others.

²The world is full of beauty and wonder, but it is also filled with death, disease, destruction, decay, and conflict. God warned us this would be the outcome if we rebelled. 

It is no wonder life is often so difficult. Instead of being surprised or put off by adversity, we should anticipate it. Christ said in this world you will have tribulation (adversity). But he also said "fear not, I have overcome the world." How? By coming back to life after embracing our pain, suffering, and eventual death so we too would participate in His resurrected life one day.

Adversity has nothing to do with God's love - in the sense that he no longer loves us when we struggle or go through hard times. But it also has everything to do with God's love because he uses all things (including and especially the hard things) for our good i.e. to draw us closer to him in greater dependence and trust through our struggles so we might become more like His Son to more fully experience His love and reflect it out to others i.e. to let our light shine, which is His light shinning in and through us.

being righteous, living righteously

Is there a difference between being righteous (before God) and living righteously?

Even though God, in and through Christ, grants us righteousness (perfect standing) before Him legally, he still desires us to ²live righteously. It is only through ²righteous living we are daily in tune with who God is and most aligned with putting Him on display i.e. honoring and glorifying Him.

He created us to be aligned with his will (design) in our conduct, so we might experience more of Him and His love and best put Him on display (honor or glorify Him) before others. This is the desired outcome of the good standing God has fully secured for us in Christ. 

To say it another way, God grants us a right standing legally, so we might live right. Not to be more right with God legally (this has already been totally settled by and in Christ), but to partake of Him more in our everyday lives practically. He wants us to live righteously so we might more fully partake of his love, life, and joy and pass it on to others more effectively. This brings more attention to Him, so others might also find Him and find life in Him.

In fact, the whole intent of making us right with Him is so we will live righteously for His honor.

‭‭

The idea of being made right in order to live right is expressed in several places but most often and clearly in Paul's letter to the Romans.

‭‭Romans 6:4 ESV‬‬

We were buried therefore with him by baptism into death, in order that, just as Christ was raised from the dead by the glory of the Father, we too might walk in newness of life.

‭‭Romans 7:4 ESV‬‬

Likewise, my brothers, you also have died to the law through the body of Christ, so that you may belong to another, to him who has been raised from the dead, in order that we may bear fruit for God. 

"There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus (i.e. we are perfectly right with God in Christ). For the law of the Spirit of life has set you free in Christ Jesus from the law of sin and death. For God has done what the law, weakened by the flesh, could not do. By sending his own Son in the likeness of sinful flesh and for sin, he condemned sin in the flesh, in order that the righteous requirement of the law might be fulfilled in us..." - Rom ‭8:1‭-‬5‬

Each of the above 3 passages shows that the desired outcome of God making us right with him is that we live righteously. 

In fact, in several of Paul's letters (Ephesians, Colossians, ³Hebrews and Romans) the first part of the letter lays out what God has done for us regarding our unrighteous state, and the remaining part deals with how we are to conduct ourselves in light of this.

This is clearest in the book of Romans, where the first 11 chapters elaborate on our alienation from God and what He has done for us in Christ, then from chapter 12 on it shifts to how we conduct ourselves in light of this. 

I appeal to you therefore, brothers, by the mercies of God, (i.e. in light of what I have said up to this point regarding what God has done for us) to present your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and acceptable to God, which is your spiritual worship.

Did only Paul bring this out? No, Peter and others did as well.

23 When he was reviled, he did not revile in return; when he suffered, he did not threaten, but continued entrusting himself to him who judges justly. 24 He himself bore our sins in his body on the tree, that we might die to sin and live to righteousness. By his wounds you have been healed. - 1 Pet 2:23-24

This connection by multiple writers isn't a coincidence, it is because righteous living must always flow out of a righteous standing with God. This is clearly implied and stated explicitly in the above and other passages. If how we live has not changed, we need to be sure we truly know Him. 

For a further discussion on being right vs living right click here

What is the good news? click here

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Footnotes: 

²What exactly is righteous living or living righteously? When our conduct is perfectly aligned with God's design and will. 

And what is God's design and will for us and all creation? That in everything we do and say we honor and glorify him. In doing so, we also experience our own significance - glory. 

And how do we best honor and glorify him. By loving him with all her heart, soul, mind, and strength and our neighbors as ourselves. Love (relationship) is the driving force in these commandments and righteous living is the result. 

God's love for us is first and our responding back to him in love is the result. We will not value or love God above all others until we experience his value or love for us. 

Which comes first our valuing and loving Him or Him valuing and loving us? We love him because he first loved us.

³There is good reason to believe Paul dictated the book of Hebrews to Luke, who wrote it. The way the letter flows and unfolds - the thorough knowledge of the OT - is characteristics of other letters by Paul, not someone who is Greek such as Luke. But the style and elegance of the Greek used in the book is indicative of Luke. So some suggest it was a collaboration between Paul and Luke. 

There are other reasons some believe Paul dictated it. Primarily because, as far as we know, all but one of Paul's letters (including Hebrews) was dictated. 

Also Luke was a highly educated Greek national and medical doctor, fluent in proper Greek. Hebrews was written with grammatical precision, using several words unique to the book of Hebrews. This was uncharacteristic of Paul's other letters but similar to the style used in the gospel of Luke. For these reasons, many think Paul didn't write it but dictated it to Luke. Explaing why it has characteristics of both Paul and Luke. The fact that he considered himself the apostle to the Gentile adds even more credibility to this view. 

It is also believed that Paul deliberately did not identify as the author since he was considered the apostle to the Gentiles and not looked upon favorably by the Judizers within Jewish circles. Some suggest he left his name off to avoid any resistance to the letters' reception and wide circulation within the Jewish community at large. After all, why would the apostle to the Gentiles be writing a letter to Hebrews.  

But Paul's love for his own people was clearly expressed in Romans chapter 9. Knowing this, it would make perfect sense that he still had an intense desire to reach his people even though God had called him to be an apostle to the Gentiles. 

When we are weak we are strong

God's power is perfected in our weakness. If we do not understand this we will interpret his guidance as ¹abandonment.

Do we have any examples to support this in scripture? Not only do we have several examples, but the ultimate example by the most significant person who ever walked the earth.

What did the Spirit do after the public announcement of Christ's ministry? He led him into the wilderness to be tested.

"Then Jesus was led up by the Spirit into the wilderness to be tempted by the devil." - Mat 4:1

It wasn't until after this that Christ went forth in power to share the good news of His coming kingdom.

If this was necessary for Christ how much more so for us?

Paul tells us that God's power is perfected in our struggles and weakness (2 Cor 12:8-9). God even sent a messenger of Satan to harass him, not unlike God allowing Satan to inflict suffering on Job. God was in charge in both cases. If we do not understand this we will interpret God's directing us into periods of testing as ¹abandonment.

We usually don't feel like God is with us when we are in the wilderness, do we? It is usually lonely and often confusing. We are tempted to ask God, "where are you?! Why have you ¹left me?!

Christ learned obedience through the things He suffered. If this was necessary for Christ, the perfect Son of God and man, why would - or should - it be different for us who are far from perfect? 

Our need to learn to trust the Father is greater than Christ's - though His trust in the Father was tested far more than ours will likely ever be. 

"Therefore...let us also lay aside every weight, and sin which clings so closely, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, looking to Jesus, the founder and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is seated at the right hand of the throne of God." Heb 12:1-2

If we do not understand that God is in the test - working by and through it for our spiritual advancement - we will not be able to "count it all joy" as James exhorts, when we go through hard times. We will be unstable and tossed about in and by our distrust.

"Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith (trust) produces steadfastness. 

And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing. 

If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask God, who gives generously to all without reproach, and it will be given him. 

But let him ask in faith, with no doubting, for the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea that is driven and tossed by the wind. For that person must not suppose that he will receive anything from the Lord; he is a double-minded man (who trusts God one moment and doubts Hin the next), unstable in all his ways." - James 1:2-8

For a discussion on why faith is a fight click here. 
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¹Matthew 27:46 ESV‬‬
And about the ninth hour Jesus cried out with a loud voice, saying, “Eli, Eli, lema sabachthani?” that is, “My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?” 

legitimate vs illegitimate business

What distinguishes a legitimate enterprise or business from an illegitimate one? 

Being ¹service driven vs. solely profit-driven.

There is nothing wrong with profit in itself, but when profit becomes the ²sole motive, serving others becomes irrelevant or secondary at best and usually and eventually leads to ⁴harm to others. This is a disservice and the opposite of serving others.

When an enterprise is focused on ²serving others we are loving our neighbors and helping them flourish, the result is the customers' ²benefit. If we persevere, it often results in our benefit as well, i.e. profit. We "win" by helping others "win." But serving others should always be our focus, regardless. 

As believers, this is carrying out the commandment to love our neighbor as we love ourselves i.e. treating others the way we would like to be treated. If we gain (profit) in this exercise, this is a good thing, not bad i.e. it is not exploiting our fellow man or the planet, as ⁵some assert, but the possible (not guaranteed) fruit of serving them.  

The most successful enterprises are those that find a ¹legitimate ³need of others and meet it better than anyone else. The greater the need, the greater the service we can provide. The greater the service, the greater the opportunity for profit if we are diligent. 

For a discussion on sowing and reaping click here. 

For a discussion about socialism vs capitalism click here. 

For a discussion on doing things with excellence click here. 

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¹The nature of the need is also vital in determining the legitimacy of the enterprise or service e.g. providing healthy food vs junk food is a legitimate endeavor. Providing a want such as junk food (or pornography, or abortions etc) simply because there is a demand for it is not. There may be large profits in these kinds of offers but if an offer is contrary to God's design it is ultimately destructive and a disservice to others and humanity at large regardless of demand or the amount of profit.

²Even when profit becomes the primary motive, serving others becomes secondary, which also ultimately leads to people's ⁴harm and the opposite of serving others.

For both the provider and the consumer. This is a "win-win" scenario. 

³We must distinguish between needs and wants. Needs are vital to our existence and flourishing. Wants, no matter how great, are merely what we desire but will cause us to perish if we do not obtain them i.e. they are not essential to our existence but are designed to merely give us greater comfort versus greater fruitfulness i.e. productivity. 

We are called to be productive (fruitful) and anything that enables us to do so is legitimate.

This is our initial mandate in the Old Testament:

‭‭Genesis 1:28-30 

[28] And God blessed them. And God said to them, “Be fruitful and multiply and fill the earth and subdue it, and have dominion over the fish of the sea and over the birds of the heavens and over every living thing that moves on the earth.” [29] And God said, “Behold, I have given you every plant yielding seed that is on the face of all the earth, and every tree with seed in its fruit. You shall have them for food. [30] And to every beast of the earth and to every bird of the heavens and to everything that creeps on the earth, everything that has the breath of life, I have given every green plant for food.” And it was so. 

And repeated in the New Testament: 

‭‭John 15:5 

[5] I am the vine; you are the branches. Whoever abides in me and I in him, he it is that bears much fruit, for apart from me you can do nothing... 

[8] By this my Father is glorified, that you bear much fruit and so prove to be my disciples...

 

[16] You did not choose me, but I chose you and appointed you that you should go and bear fruit and that your fruit should abide, so that whatever you ask the Father in my name, - regarding advancing God's rule (kingdom) of love - he may give it to you. 

⁴Such as using corn syrup in foods as a sweetener because it is cheaper and adds more to the bottom line even though it's harmful to us.

⁵Ayn Rand asserted capitalism and altruism are opposites and do not mix i.e. that in a true free market system we can not benefit (win) by helping others benefit (win). 

Click here for a 2-minute video of her explaining worldview. 

However, as an atheist, she didn't understand the dynamic of being empowered to love others when we know we are fully loved. 

She interpreted altruism as a giving away of - or others taking from us - our dignity and not an expression of the dignity we derive from God, the eternal overflowing fountain of love. She saw altruism only as others taking from us by force vs our freely, gladly, and willingly giving to others out of our fullness of receiving all things from our Creator. A subtle but vital distinction. 

This distinguishes God's Kingdom from communism. This also reveals how the progressive side of the church is unwittingly sympathetic to communism, which is vastly different from advancing God's kingdom. 

Givers vs takers

For a discussion on how we are designed to be givers and not takers click here.

When service is our primary focus - but profit is also desired

(though not primary) - this puts innovation front and center. It causes us to continually look for creative ways to meet the unmet needs of our fellow humans and how to also generate the necessary funding to continue to do so. 

Often, not always, the copycats of successful innovation are driven purely by profit.